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Friday, May 6, 2016

Classic Ross Rambles: When is violent rage appropriate?

Friday, March 9, 2007

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

One of my pet peeves is a person getting inappropriately angry over a minor annoyance. As a matter of fact, such behavior often prompts me to start smashing things with the hammer I keep in my desk drawer.

It's all right to point out mistakes, but it's inappropriate to go on and on about unintentional errors, like when I accidentally pull out a person's fingernail with my pliers. Those things happen.

However, there are repeated and blatant acts that justify fits of uncontrolled rage.

Lately, I've been getting pushed over the edge by the practice of truncating the nine-tenths of a cent from the price of gasoline. Whenever I see a price advertised as costing $2.29.9 per gallon, I mentally adjust the price to $2.30 per gallon, but most people will refer to the price as $2.29, as if nine-tenths of a cent is closer to nothing than it is to a penny.

For a time, the state of Iowa outlawed the practice of charging in increments of tenths of a cent for gasoline, but gas station owners pressured the state to rescind this law. People in border towns were traveling to different states to save what they thought was a penny on a gallon of gas, when they were actually only saving a tenth of a cent on each gallon, maybe as much as 2 cents on a fill up.

These idiots didn't realize that even if they were saving a penny a gallon, it wouldn't be cost effective to go much more than a thousand feet out of their way and back again to save the penny.

There are other behaviors I've mentioned before that induce states of frenzied malevolence, such as the lottery claiming a prize of, for example $100 million, that is actually an annuity worth less than half the stated prize, paying out the stated amount over a 29-year period. Staff writer Dan Whitney recently wrote about marketers claiming to give away something free when a purchase is required to get the "free" prize.

And who can restrain themselves from smashing things into tiny pieces when a claim is made that something is homemade when it is obviously prepared in a restaurant or retail establishment?

Speaking of annoyances, I hate it when people at the office interrupt me to ask whether I'm talking to myself. I angrily tell them to butt out of my conversation. They back off but continue to give me that look.

In my youth, my siblings would look at me like that when, during a heated argument, I would bring out the chainsaw from the kitchen and fire it up.

By the way, we didn't always keep the chainsaw in the kitchen, but after a few nasty shower accidents, it was decided not to keep it in the bathroom anymore.

Anyway, there are some things that I can't even think about without becoming livid, like when I order a grilled ham and cheese and the sandwich is served UPSIDE DOWN!

And now I can't find my hammer! It was right in the drawer by the pliers, which are also missing! There must be a chainsaw somewhere around here.