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Thursday, Apr. 28, 2016

Winding Roads: Parents, communicate with your kids

Monday, March 8, 2010

The other day I read in the paper about a 17 year old boy and a 13 year old girl caught having sex at 2:45 a.m. The article was drawing attention to this incident as whether it is an occurrence more of late or one that has been going on for years. I laid in bed thinking about this situation and wondered what was going wrong for things like this to happen and decided that one can not pin-point one incident.

My first thought was that teenage boys need to be made well aware that sex with a young girl is asking for major problems if caught as they will be labeled as a sex offender even though the girl may very well be a willing partner. Both children need counseling -- no argument there. But my main question is where are the parents? I can't imagine my kids out that late for either age but for the 13 year old, it's totally unacceptable. Where are the parents?

I had some friends who noted kids sneak in and out of the house when parents aren't aware. I never went totally asleep until I heard them come home. But long before they think about the opposite sex, parents need conversations with their children. One builds knowledge and respect over the years, not over night. These parents should have a good talking to and then some. I know that many institutions, such as the local school districts, all but raise some kids totally and they don't need more dumped on them.

I think it gets back to church attendance. I know not everything is 100 percent guaranteed, but it surely would help with most. That brings to mind how as a kid, we had three types of clothes in our closet. The first were play clothes around the home. The second was clothes for school, and lastly was clothes for church or dressing up for weddings and such.

Now before you jump down my throat, I will say if you have only one choice and the clothes are clean, fine. Wear them to church. We were taught to respect the Lord's house by wearing your best. But the folks I'm thinking of have plenty of clothes and yet the great majority of the time these teens and some adults, are wearing faded blue jeans with the "worn-out" look. Most are too tight, low waisted and droop terribly. The girls are wearing stretched tight tops with low revealing tops and with every bend-over movement, one wonders just how much will be revealed.

Actually, we see much crepey or wrinkled skin. Old women are like dried prunes and many seem to think they are 20 yet revealing whatever. It's just that when these girls move so freely about, one just has to grimace on what may be revealed. Too many midriffs are exposed. All of this enforces the lack of respect. There is a time and place for everything. The Bible does teach modesty. One can be risque with proper person, place and time.

Why can't parents teach that to their children?

All good things come in good time. First let kids be kids. Society has allowed and encouraged kids to grow up before their time. I said before and I'll say it again, shows like "Little House on the Prairie" and "The Waltons" were depicting a time in this country when times were hard but families were close and the little things in life were greatly appreciated. Perhaps, the tightening of the financial belt will encourage family activities such as game boards or computer games together as opposed to each going their separate ways. We don't need all of the trinkets we purchase.

The time is now for families to return to the priorities of our grandparents by putting family first and helping those in need to help reduce wayward children. Parents need to let children know you care and understand the process of growing up, but it takes time. We don't need to rush it.