Iowa may be lagging last in economic performance, but we are Number One in hogs. Eggs too. Celebrate that we have the most polluted surface water on the continent. On some things we will not be outdone. Nobody rivals us on manure.
Gov. Kim Reynolds was thinking about this as she prepares to bid adieu to Terrace Hill.
“I hope the next governor of Iowa will build on this grace-built partnership because no matter who’s holding office at the Capitol, we have a duty to safeguard and steward the beautiful gift that we’ve been given,” Reynolds told the right wing Family Leader summit in Des Moines.
Rural Iowa votes for that. Appanoose County, seated at Centerville, voted 72% Republican in 2024. It has the highest poverty rate at 20%. Crawford (Denison) is No. 7 at 16%, and neighboring Cherokee is No. 12 at 15%. Red as beets.
Such a beautiful gift to fight with Mississippi for last in personal income or growth. Iowa is contracting. Not many places can claim that.
Fortunately, this grace-built partnership will not be disturbed by the Democrats who quietly wander in the weeds hoping not to be seen as upsetting any of these trends.
Our income taxes are next to nil. Yeah, schools may be worse off. You can’t have a baby at the Newton hospital anymore. On the other hand, you won’t have cross-dressers playing basketball. Black history will be taught in a nice way — they learned a trade as slaves, at least, and Stonewall Jackson was one helluva man. We will enjoy being first in corn ethanol.
Sac City has the world’s largest popcorn ball. Spencer has the world’s largest county fair. We have enough manure for 125 million people. That ain’t nothin’. It’s something for Reynolds’s successor to build on.
There is no reason we have to share last place with Mississippi. We can be every bit as backwards and then some, and as stubborn or worse. We can outdo them, and Reynolds still has a year.
We are not turning back from consolidation and loss. It is who we are. We’ve been at it since 1980. By almost all metrics we are going to the dregs, and the Hawkeyes are not going to the Rose Bowl. Gov. Reynolds warned us repeatedly that criminal elements were pouring over the borders and into our communities, and if we don’t deport them we certainly do expect that they will show up for work on the kill floor. Because, we are tip-top in pork.
When farmers owned the hogs we didn’t need loans to attend Iowa State, which used to be the top land-grant university. We were not No. 1 in polluted water. The Hawkeyes made the Rose Bowl. Call me a romantic. But doesn’t it tell us something that the economic model we have adopted — slash income taxes, consolidate agriculture, shut down rural communities, restrict access to health care — coincides with us draining out our prospects? All so we can remain dominant in poo. My problem is that I do not view it as the asset that it is. Other people would kill to have a pile of dung that deep.
Part of the beautiful gift of low-to-no income taxes are property taxes so high you can barely afford to put a roof over your head.
Randy Feenstra can roll with this. He is the most prominent Republican candidate to replace Reynolds. He did his time in the legislature helping set up the one-party state. He honed his craft amid the alligators in the Washington swamp. He blew off the farm bill long enough to make sure nutritionists could not influence food programs. He voted to gut food programs and Medicaid. He knows the territory. He’s fine with it, because his folks get theirs.
That’s why you’re last, so the least shall not be first. It’s in the Bible. We’re just here to bring in the sheaves. Keep the taxes off the master and keep your eye on the corn rows, because that’s how we do it with the monied folks in charge, putting on a show as if they were Christians.
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